Subscribe via RSSValentine's Day Chart of Gifts
Wednesday, January 02, 2008 |
Gentlemen (and ladies), Valentine’s Day is quickly approaching. Or at least it’s closer than it was at Christmas Eve. The important thing is…..what should you get for your sweetie?
Here’s a few gift ideas depending on how long you’ve know your significant other:
Known her 0-3 months: Wash her car and maybe get her some Armorall for the tires. However—this is important—do not take her car without her knowledge or you could end up in jail.
Known her for 3 months-1 year: Anything that inflates and costs less than $10. Buying something that does not inflate could make you seem needy or creepy. Likewise, keeping the budget to $10 is crucial as to not scare her into thinking you have a shrine to her in your spare bedroom----even if you do.
Known her for 1-3 years: By this time, you will feel like you know her really well. You don’t. Listen to her. If she says things like “Man are my feet cold”, buy her some cute slippers or toe socks. If she says, “I am really craving lobster”, don’t take her out to eat lobster. It’s a trick. Instead, get her the toe socks.
Known her 3-7 years: By now, you feel like an old pro when it comes to this Valentine’s Day gift stuff. Don’t let your guard down for a second. This is a critical period. Buy her flowers. Not the cliché red roses, but something that says, “I really really like you and you have tolerated me for the last 3-7 years.” Perhaps carnations or some other spring flower as a way of saying, ”Our love has just begun.” Whatever you do----DO NOT write the words, “Our love has just begun” on the card. This will lead into a conversation involving the words, “Oh really? What in the $&^#@! Have we been doing for the past 3-7 years?” Just sign it “Love, (your name)”. Keep it simple. It’s the guys who try to show off that get into predicaments. Don’t be one of those guys.
Known her over 7 years: Go into Hallmark, find a cashier about the age of your wife/girlfriend and ask, “I need a good Valentine’s Day Card. Could you help me?” Regardless of what she picks out, just go with it. This is mystical forces you are dealing with. Don’t mess it up and don’t buy one that plays, “Baby Got Back”.
Go forward and purchase with confidence.
